Crazy Letter to Obama From a Luo

LETTER TO OBAMA FROM KISUMO

...
Dear long distance kasin,

You refused to reply the letter that i sent through yahoo, i
donno why, but sokey sorait. am assuming osama bin
laden resurrected, hacked the network, intersected the letter,
edited it and included an attachment of a bomb, thereby
prompting interpol and FBI to take the letter and diffuse the
bomb. that has entered my heart malit but onge wach
anything is possible, even beyonce teeee goes to the toilet
whether se likes it or not.

koro this letter am sending through gmail, i hope it will
reach.
kasin, buana i heard you are coming these sides? that
specifically, you are coming to University of  Nairobi and
Statwhouse, is it true? how can you come to Kenya and fail to come to kogelo, siaya??
kasin you need to come and witness for yourself-your lion is
falling down, the cowdung of the chest of your lion is
peeling, grass is growing in the centre of your lion, the roof
of your lion is letting the sun into the lion, dogs are chasing
sleep in your lion with their women, cats are using your lion
as a jerrican, your grandmother is being insulted by adan
duale that se is a thief and is greedy, the dipiuty is hiring a
cheap jet at sh100 million, cows producing KCC are talking,
pigs are in parliament, GOR beat AFC leopards and put it in
the mbugru and finally linda ogutu will read the KTN news at
9!
kasin, i hope misel, sasa and malia are okay? espesially
malia....
please reply, even with 'k'
yours tribemate, fellow english speaking nilote,
# COPYRIGHT2015
jaduong'